| HOUSE OF 1000 CORPSES |
 2003 -
USA
Director: Rob Zombie - Reviewed by Tom
On the way they pick up a screwed-up blonde girl named Baby who is just bait for what follows. Their tire conveniently gets shot out, so the family of freaks can "help" them with the tow truck and get them into their home. They end up in the house, and it's pretty predictable what happens next: Hands get chopped, razor blades slice across the face, there's a scalping, a face removed and worn like a mask, bunny costumes, missing cheerleaders, and some kind of strange brain surgery. The story takes a similar turn as Chainsaw Massacre as the kids try to escape with all their parts and body fluids intact, while getting hacked and chopped by the wierdos. Think about it for a moment, and you can probably figure out the plot from this point on. The movie did have its share squishy parts, but nothing really groundbreaking for a horror movie. Visually it was pretty well done—kind of like one of those strange White Zombie music videos with a lot going on in the background—but the scary scenes were pretty generic, and not really scary at all. The movie really fell apart with the lack of character development (fairly normal for a movie like this though). Notice I didn't bother naming too many characters in this review? You can't really put a name on a flat cardboard character! Slice breakdown: 1 slice—Hey, musician Rob Zombie directed the movie! Gotta give him credit for trying something new. 1 slice—There were a couple scenes that were somewhat disturbing. |
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House of 1,000 Corpses is very similar to The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, featuring a family of inbred hillbillies that take great pleasure in abducting lost travelers. Two couples of college-age kids are traveling on a road trip in search of interesting and odd roadside attractions for a book. So what happens? They get low on gas and pull over at the only place for miles—Captain Spaulding's Gas Station and Murder Museum. They meet Captain Spaulding, one of the crazy inbreds who is dressed up like a clown with his face painted and the whole bit. (Hey, clowns are always scary!) The kids go through the tour and learn of a "Dr. Satan" who was hung from a tree nearby. They decide to follow in the path of Dr. Satan and find out what happened.
