Director: Josh Gordon, Will Speck
Starring: Will Ferrell, Jon Heder, Will Arnett, Amy Poehler, Jenna Fischer, William Fichtner, Craig T. Nelson, Romany Malco

- Reviewed by Vickie

The proof of the overall meh-ness of this film is the fact that both Linda and I saw it last week... but neither one of us felt inspired to write about it. We were so uninspired, in fact, that we each hoped the other would pen the review. I’m taking one for the team. (Thanks, Vic! - Linda)

Will Ferrell’s been an elf, a lecherous news anchor and a dim-witted racer. With this new comedy—that lifts material from other sports films before it, most notably The Cutting Edge—he can add “boorish figure skater” to his list of onscreen personae. Ferrell stars as the bloated, mullet-sporting Chazz Michael Michaels—a once lauded male figure skater with a sex addition, whose on-ice glory has melted thanks to a lifetime ban from the sport. He engaged in some fisticuffs with his main rival, golden-boy Jimmy MacElroy (Jon Heder), and the figure skating federation tossed the duo... but a teeny loophole in the rule books gives Jimmy an idea: put their differences aside and join forces to create the world’s first male-male pairs team in order to medal at the next international games (which are so obviously the Olympics but referred to as something else because, apparently, no one secured the rights to the iconic logo).

Using the same pseudo-“gay panic” humor that wasn’t funny in Talladega Nights, the film follows MacElroy and Michaels as they shove their crotches in each other faces in the name of sport. They hate each other, they train, they get better... blah blah blah. Their main competition comes from American media darlings, brother-sister pair Stranz (Will Arnett) and Fairchild (Amy Poehler) Van Waldenberg. They’re over-the-top, tacky and fiercely determined to win at all costs... even if it means tormenting their younger sister, Katie (Jenna Fischer), into helping them cheat.

Obviously, someone thought that the film would need nothing more than Will Ferrell in a sequined unitard in order to be a laugh riot, but that was my main problem with the whole thing: it wasn’t funny enough. I mean, there were some entertaining moments—Linda particularly enjoyed the mascot mayhem, and I really liked Arnett and Poehler’s delusional siblings—but most of what was supposed to elicit uproarious laughter instead left me wanting more. Or less, as the case may be.

Part of the problem for me was the character of Chazz Michael Michaels. Ferrell’s awful wig was incredibly distracting, and the filmmakers did nothing to indicate how or why this slovenly oaf would be irresistible to women (Using pelvic thrusts in his routine to Billy Squier's "The Stroke" wasn't enough for you, Vickie? - Linda). He’s not particularly likable (not until late in the film, anyway) and is even more one-note than Ron Burgundy or Ricky Bobby. So what’s the draw? His fame on the ice? If so, it wasn’t shown. Heder’s not much better, still milking the same, tired Napoleon Dynamite schtick (“I’m geeky! Isn’t that cute?”) that he’s used in every film since, and sporting the second-worst hairpiece in the film.

Were it not for Arnett, Poehler and Fischer (who’s charming and adorable), I likely would have lopped off another slice or two. Like other Ferrell projects before it, this one seems much funnier than it is in the trailers, and would likely work better as a shorter SNL sketch than a feature-length film.

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