| BECAUSE I SAID SO |
 2007 - USADirector: Michael Lehmann
- Reviewed by Jennifer
Diane Keaton stars as Daphne Wilder, the meddling, overbearing mother of three unmemorable daughters—Maggie (Lauren Graham), Mae (Piper Perabo), and Milly (Mandy Moore). Her husband was an insensitive oaf who left her to raise the girls alone, and she clearly never recovered from the failure of this relationship. Her ultimate goal is to see her daughters married to stable men so that they may enjoy the happiness she never had... or shall we say that she wishes she could find a stable man to marry and projects onto her children instead of working on herself? At the start of the movie, Daphne is two for three, having successfully married off Maggie and Mae. Horribly, little Milly just can't seem to find a decent man. She's got her own catering business and lives in a stylish loft, but her love life is just one side-show after another. Where's it going to stop? What if she gets to be forty and she's still dating dysfunctional losers? Daphne takes matters into her own hands. Unbeknownst to her daughters, she places a personal ad and begins interviewing potential mates for Milly. Ew! After passing over a string of unsuitable men, Daphne decides that Jason (Tom Everett Scott) is the perfect man for her daughter. He's a bright young architect from a good family—now all she has to do is engineer a meeting, a few dates, and a wedding. Voila! It would be SO simple if not for the arrival of Johnny (Gabriel Macht). He's a musician who just happens to see what Daphne is up to, and he thinks he might be Mr. Right for Milly. Oh, but that's no good—all musicians are heartbreakers. She doesn't want her precious Milly getting mixed up with the likes of him! Predictably, Jason "bumps into" Milly and asks her out. No mention is made of her mother's involvement, and their relationship is off and running. However, Johnny also makes an effort to "bump into" Milly, and now their relationship is off and running too! Wow, how lucky is she to have met two great guys in one day?! No one asks for that kind of luck, so it wouldn't be polite to look a gift horse in the mouth. Milly pursues a serious relationship with each man, but she just can't decide who she likes better. Jason's got it all together, and Mom approves, but he's uptight and makes her a little uncomfortable. Johnny, on the other hand, is fun and easygoing, and doesn't seem to mind that Milly is boring, stupid, and talks incessantly. Even his dad (Stephen Collins) and his little boy are cool. Ugh! What's a girl to do? I mean, aside from both of those guys? Is anyone actually wondering which guy Milly will choose? Obviously it's Johnny. And Daphne will fall in love with his dad, and once she FINALLY gets some action, she'll be a calm, reasonable person who loves life and accepts her daughters just as they are. The end. Gag. I hope I'm not alone in thinking there's more to life than forcing your way into relationships with a shoehorn. This mindless preoccupation with finding Mr. Right has always been off-putting to me, and inevitably winds up with someone settling for a Mr. Right Now (as the saying goes). Daphne is ditzy and neurotic, unable to close a pop-up window on her computer (hint: stabbing aimlessly at the keyboard doesn't work), and forever moving furniture in the hope that one day she'll feel comfortable in her own life. The performance is classic Keaton, and provides further evidence that she's a one trick pony. Milly too has adopted the furniture-moving tick, and she's just as hapless. The scene where she endures an unfortunate case of static cling is especially painful to watch. Seriously, what kind of dolt doesn't notice a RED BALLOON stuck to her ass?! Perhaps if these women spent a little less time obsessing about boyfriends, they could make it through a day without dropping cakes and breaking dishes like a couple of stooges. DVD NOTESIf Because I Said So has somehow managed to worm its way into your heart, you can check out a "Making Of" featurette (sponsored by VW) as well as a segment on "Designing a Wilder World". Other extras include a music video for "The World Spins Madly On" by The Weepies, and an iVillage ad which made me feel like Ralphie after he decoded "be sure to drink your Ovaltine" in A Christmas Story—a lousy commercial?! |
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I was never especially excited to see Because I Said So, but I didn't think I'd actually hate it. I mean, it's pure girly fluff—how offensive is that? Hah! You'd be surprised. Three minutes in I was making a face like a baby who's just tried some vile new food, and it only got worse from there. If there's one thing I despise, it's a chick flick that makes women look stupid.
