JEM AND THE HOLOGRAMS: SEASON 1

If you were a kid in the late 80s, chances are you have spent most of your life trying to get the theme song from Jem and the Holograms out of your head. Er, or, maybe that's just me.  And all the other girls named Jen whose classmates thought it was *way* too funny to get up in your face and sing, "Jen, Jen is truly outrageous," as we turned red with fury at being associated with a cartoon and a doll that was such a ridiculously pale comparison to Barbie and the Rockers.  Why, why was her head so disproportionately huge?!  Why did her name sound so much like mine?  And why was her stupid show so addictive?

Twenty-odd years later, I have no answers to these pressing questions, but Jem and the Holograms is out on DVD and it's possible that it sucked us in with its amazing awfulness and mind-altering songs - songs like, "Winning Is Everything" with lyrics that pretty much go, "winning is everything, winning is everything, winning is everything."  But I'm getting ahead of myself.  It totally could have been the plot that left us glued to our seats.  After all, who can't relate to a girl who inherits her father's record label and must then fight an evil mastermind named Eric for control?  More to the point, who can't relate to donning jemstar earrings, generating bandmates with a hologram machine, and battling a corrupt girl group with your message of hope and positivity?  We've all been there!

Oddly, the show really does revolve around record label politics.  Will Eric actually seize control and triumph with his band The Misfits?  Or will goodness prevail for humble Jerrica and her alter-ego Jem?  And will she be able to keep her double life a secret?  The suspense is more intense than any episode of Hannah Montana.  Over the course of the series, there are plenty of opportunities to compare the two bands and their opposing values, which means you get to spend the majority of the show rocking out!  Or covering your ears!  Or having your eyes go all swirly as you slip into a hypnotic state and gaze mindlessly at the TV!  Big hair, excessive amounts of make-up, and shades of pink and purple prevail, making this a so-bad-it's-good trip down memory lane.  Gather your pals and plenty of junk food and prepare to heckle the screen.

Still can't get enough?  This ten hour collection comes complete with a Video Jukebox. Truly outrageous!