Written by Jennifer
March 22, 2009
Viggo's sexy, tortured performance is simply delicious to watch.
Over the years, A Perfect Murder has evolved into a perfect guilty pleasure. How else can I describe the utterly enjoyable experience of watching Michael Douglas, Viggo Mortensen, and Gwyneth Paltrow all trying to kill each other?
Gwyneth Paltrow stars as Emily, a young, rich socialite who marries Steven, a not-so-young businessman played by Michael Douglas. She gives no thought to a pre-nup, because she just knows she's going to live happily ever after. Years later we find her unhappy in her marriage (surprise, surprise), but working as some sort of cool, multi-lingual diplomat who gets to shag her artist boyfriend (Viggo Mortensen) on her lunch breaks.
Steven, who seems to get sleazier by the day, discovers their affair and attempts to blackmail David (a.k.a. artist boyfriend) into killing Emily so he can inherit her fortune. He's been having some financial problems, and David is actually a career con man with a bad habit of "relieving" wealthy women of their money. David doesn't really want to kill her, but he doesn't want to go to jail either. He vents his frustration through his art, and we get to see Viggo's own artwork in this movie (check out his book Recent Forgeries to see more).
David plans to tell Emily everything, but something snaps when he sees her kissing Steven outside. Though he can't go through with the murder, he thoughtfully sends someone else in his place. Such a poor conflicted soul! He even sleeps in a fetal position on the floor when he fears she's dead. Viggo's sexy, tortured performance is simply delicious to watch.
Michael Douglas is shockingly unlikable and evil in this movie, but I can see how Emily might bring out the worst in a person: she is sometimes quite clever, and sometimes seems functionally retarded. Take for instance, the scene where the phone rings at least 500 times while she's in the tub. On the 388th ring, she rolls her eyes and climbs out to get it. Wouldn't any normal person think it was a lost cause at that point? And doesn't a wealthy lady like her have an answering machine? Even more annoying is the fact that she says hello three times, then asks, "who is this?" when there is clearly no one there. She'd probably go on all night if someone didn't grab her from behind and try to strangle her. Then she becomes clever again, and saves herself by driving a meat thermometer into the burglar's neck.
There are a variety sketchily-explained anomalies in A Perfect Murder, including the mystery of the missing key, and Steven's squeaky clean albi (Wake up you idiots! He didn't do it, he planned it!) Even so, I've come to the conclusion that the imperfections in A Perfect Murder are part of its charm. No matter how many times I watch it, I never seem to remember the mechanics of Steven's evil scheme. It's entirely possible that it doesn't make any sense, but everything about this film is so sleek that you're inclined to believe the pieces fit. With a cast like this, who needs a plot anyway?
